Behind the Scenes with Addi Scott Header Behind the Scenes

  • Summer is here?

    Posted by Addi Scott

    Our kiddos had their last day of school today! We moved recently, which means that next year they will be going to a different school. We LOVED the school they were at so we are all a little sad to have to say good bye, but change is good right?  Hope you all have an awesome summer with your kids too! We are going to be spending a TON of time outside on the water slide, going to parks, and hanging out!! It sure doesn't seem like summer with this cold weather though...hope it goes away soon!

  • Fun Things For Summer

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I need help! The kids have their last day of school tomorrow, and I want their summer to be filled with fun and great memories!!  I have some things planned but I am looking for some fun things in the Green Bay area that maybe are less popular that maybe I have not heard about? Any suggestions are much appreciated!!

  • From Our Family to Yours

    Posted by Addi Scott

    Being a photographer you would think we would have a ton of family pictures but we really have very few, and the candid ones are always my favorite so I thought I would share one from yesterday with you.

    Hope you all had a great Easter and I hope you are all out enjoying this gorgeous weather!!

  • Its The Little Things

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I know this is really long, but if you have a few minutes, it is a very powerful read. Makes you really appreciate the little things in a marriage.

     

    MARRIAGE

     

    When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

     

    Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

    She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

     

    I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

     

    With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

    She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

     

    The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

     

    When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

     

    In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

     

    This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

    She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

     

    I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

     

    My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outsidethe door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

     

    On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

     

    On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

    On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

     

    She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

     

    Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

     

    Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

     

    But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

    I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

     

    She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

    Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

     

    At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

     

    That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

    My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

     

    The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

     

    If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

     

    If you do, you just might save a marriage.

    Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

     

    A friend of mind posted this, I am not sure who wrote it, but I found it very inspiring!!

  • Facebook. Good or bad??

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I am warning you, this blog post is nothing but me complaining so if you don't want to hear me complain, stop reading!

    What is the deal with people on Facebook, really. It seems to me like people think that just because you are not dealing with others on a face to face basis, that they do not have to follow normal rules of how to be a human. People are mean, caddy, whiney and (I am guilty of this one) terribly negative.

    We put out there every little thing we do, what we are having for lunch, what a good price we just got on underwear on sale, etc. These are not things that I would normally share with 597 people! Seriously, I don't care what you had for lunch, and I am confident that none of you care what I am having either.

    Don't get me wrong. Its a great way to get in touch with old friends that you may have otherwise lost forever. But on the other hand, its a terrible way for old friends to find you that you had finally gotten rid of!

    Now granted, I am probably not the norm. I am a Facebook addict. No really I am, just ask Bryan, so I know that I experience things on Facebook that people who go on occasionally do not. Being the addict that I am however, I am thinking about deleting my profile all together. Sure, I could just delete those people that are negative, or clearly don't understand that actual people with actual feelings are reading this stuff, but then I would be accused of being a bad person by said people. Do I care at this point? Maybe not, but I do care what people think of me and I try to be a good person.

    Sorry for the rant, maybe I am all alone in this, but if one of you feels the same way, then I know that I am not crazy. :D

  • What Is Your Love Language?

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I heard about this book about 4 years ago, when we were having some issues with our oldest child Emma. She was acting out a lot, and not really acting like herself and we could not figure out why. A friend of mine told me about the book The 5 Love Languages of Children. I was pregnant with our third at the time, and had a lot of complications, and was very uncomfortable for the majority of the pregnancy, so I wasn't spending any snuggle time with her, we had very short hugs and kisses goodnight which was not how it was before I had gotten pregnant.

    After reading the book I realized that her love language was physical touch, so the fact that I was no longer giving her that snuggle time and big hugs, was in turn, not showing her that I loved her, even though I was still telling her all the time. Needless to say I felt horrible, and once I figured it out, I made sure that I hugged her and kissed her and snuggled with her as much as possible. Within a week, her behavior went right back to normal because in my opinion, she didn't feel the need to act out anymore because she once again knew that I loved her.

    I came across this website today where you can actually take a small test (takes about 5 minutes) to find out not only what your kids love languages are, but what yours and your spouses are.

    Mine happens to be Words of Affirmation, meaning that when Bryan says nice things to me that makes me know that I love him. His is physical touch like Emma, so he can hug me 50 times a day thinking that I must know he loves me, but that doesn't mean as much to me as it does to him.

    This is something that has really strengthened our marriage, and our parenting abilities, so I highly recommend going to the website and taking the test! Feel free to share your results too!

    Oh, and if you don't have kids or a spouse? There is a test for singles too!

    http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/

  • Yes, I Sprained My Ankle Rollerskating

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I am sure most of you know this already, but now I need to whine a little. Having a sprained ankle and three kids really sucks! I feel completely helpless. Poor Bryan has to do all the cooking, and cleaning and everything else while I sit on my butt with my foot up on pillows and watch. For those of you who have had something like this happen, is it normal for me to be feeling a little depressed? I mean, I feel like I am cut off from the world almost. Yes, I have facebook and a phone so it's not really that bad, but it is really starting to get to me!  I have so much stuff to do, including finishing the unpacking from our move a few weeks ago and I can do nothing. I just needed to whine to someone. And you guys are such good listeners!!

  • Funny??

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I went to lunch with a friend the other day and I took Will (who is 3) with me. As we were sitting at lunch Will turned to me and said "Mommy, I think I will call you booger" I responded "Well, I don't think that is very nice." And he looked at me raised his eyebrows and said "Yeah, but it's funny!!" I don't know that I have ever laughed so hard in my life. And really, I couldn't even get mad about it because he was so funny about it!

  • A Little Pick Me Up for The Mommies

    Posted by Addi Scott

    Sometimes when I get free time I like to putz around on the internet. Especially if I am having a particularly hard time being a mom that day, if the kids are being naughty, or I haven't gotten anything done. It is amazing how many inspirational videos are out there!

     

  • This Is TOO Cute

    Posted by Addi Scott

    I don't normally share things like this but I saw this and it so reminded me of something that would happen at our house and she is just too cute!

     
    Click here to play video

     

  • -20...Are You Kidding Me?!?!

    Posted by Addi Scott

    When we woke up this morning we checked the weather like always and it said it was -4, but -22 with the windchill. At what point in Wisconsin is it too cold. Really. I have lived here my whole life so you would think I would be used to it, but seriously?! I was a little shocked that the kids still have school today! I think I am going to start a campaign that once it hits below zero, we will not be required to leave our homes until it is above 30 again. Who's with me?!